About me?  Who am I?  Wife, Mom, Daughter, Christian, Friend…simple titles that can’t even begin to describe the craziness that is me.  🙂   I love chocolate, reading, writing, adventure/sci-fi/fantasy/ movies, chocolate, just about anything Disney, science, history, chocolate, the great outdoors, the great indoors, games, and did I mention chocolate?  I’m also a bit of an introvert.  Okay…a lot of an introvert, which seems kinda counter intuitive with writing a blog.  But I’m also quite opinionated…though some might say I’m just “full of it”.  My grandpa used to say all the time that I was “full of bologna”…so I suppose we can all blame him.  🙂

I also tend to jump around a bit…from one project/idea to another.  That’s why ForeverWhy was never just about one topic…like a food blog or something.  I think I’d implode if I tried to stick to just one type of topic.

I’ve been wondrously and joyously married to my best friend, Raymond (RJ to family and friends) for 22 crazy years.  His geekness compliments and completes my own crazy geekness.  And we are well on our way to corrupting our kidlets with some geekness they can call their own.  In case you didn’t know, geekness is like greatness…only way better!  🙂

Speaking of kidlets…we have 7.   Yep.  You read that right.  Seven.  Seven beautiful and amazing miracles.  And I get to be their Mom.  By far my favorite job.  You can read more about them here…and of course throughout ForeverWhy, because if I have an opinion about anything at all…it’s about my beautiful kidlets.  Right?

I’ve been “blogging” off and on since way before blogging was the “in” thing.  Way back when MySpace was big and geocities was the go to personal webpage place.  The proverbial computer geek, my lovable hubby,  tried so hard to drag me into his computer world.  He designed many webpages and databases and all things internet geeky…and I tried to stay excited and helpful.  I really did.  But back then…there was a lot of “coding” and crazy computer language that I just couldn’t wrap my head around.  Plus, life in general was just too busy and crazy…at least I thought so.  But I tried…I really did.  It was fun keeping family “in the loop” as our kidlets grew.  And it was strangely satisfying letting myself “be heard” from time to time.

But life happens, and everything moves forward.  Changes and growth and craziness happens.  And I just couldn’t keep up a consistent blog…no matter how opinionated and crazy I am.

Thankfully technology continues to change…in complex ways to be sure…but accessing, using, and creating have become easier…simpler.  Blogging is everywhere and easier.  Facebook, Twitter, Instagram…are really big and so much easier to use…though I’m still trying to figure it all out.

Almost a decade ago, I started ForeverWhy…a crazy attempt to once again keep family up to date on how our family was doing, and a way to share some opinions and ideas.  A brave endeavor from this hardcore introvert!  But I was determined to do it!  ForeverWhy started as a crazy dream, and I was going to see how far I could fly with it.

Then life happened.  Again.  And not in a happy or expected way.  In fact, many very unhappy and unexpected things happened…and I could not process or cope with them very well.  On their own…no problem.  Two or three at a time…maybe.  All at once…not a chance.

It became very apparent that what I thought was “too busy and crazy” in our life before, was actually quick simple and sane.  Social technology went from complex to something simpler…and my life went from something simpler to very complex.  Hmmm…there might be an essay or thesis in there somewhere.  Or perhaps a few opinion posts?

It’s taken us a few years to put a little sanity back into our craziness…well at least for me.  RJ and the kidlets seem to have bounced back and rolled with the punches a lot better then I have.  But I’m getting there.  It’s taken a lot of tears, patience, hard work, and more tears to get this far.  It’ll take a lot more I’m sure.

I’ve had a few doctors, on more the one occasion, ask if I’d been trained as a nurse or other medical professional.  Nope…not formally.  But I’ve learned quite a lot over the years…raising our crazy monsters has seen to that.  I’ve learned to fight for their health…and knowledge is critical in that fight.

So…what was/is the craziness you ask?  Let’s see…are you ready…spinal nerve damage; unknown painful neuropathy; lumbar arthritis and most likely arthritis in hips, feet and hands; suspected Fibromyalgia (docs wouldn’t touch a diagnosis); chronic adrenal fatigue; Adenomyosis; estrogen dominance; suspected early menopause (ended up being another failed pregnancy); suspected mast cell disorder (this one I believe strongly to be the case); 2 almost attempted suicides; diagnosed anxiety and depression disorder, with a heavy emphasis on processing issues, and the crazy inability to take most anti medication; the loss of my brother to cancer; our dog died; 3 lost babies; the devastating loss of my in-laws (one to cancer, and the resulting probate nightmare); the loss of hubby’s boss (cancer again) that resulted in hubby starting his own business (which he’s great at, but the economy and stupid probate hasn’t been kind); the loss of a couple of very dear friends (cancer…again); a couple major crises of faith; one son being officially diagnosed with asthma after struggling his whole young life with Larryngeal Malaysia and restrictive airways; youngest son having unexplained polyuria and having countless food allergies along with Fructose Malabsorption; oldest son being diagnosed with Dysgraphia (a form of Dyslexia); next oldest son being officially diagnosed with Asperger Syndrome (high functioning thank goodness); oldest daughter being diagnosed with Von Whillebrand disease (a clotting disorder); next daughter being initially diagnosed with CSID (congenital sucrase-isomaltase disease) which is now in question again and thought to be a liver issue instead, she’s also been diagnosed with Tourette syndrome and possible ODD (operational defiance disorder) and Aspergers as well; and youngest daughter most likely has an anxiety disorder like her Momma.  Overwhelming to say the least.

ForeverWhy is being resurrected with a whole new look and hopefully simpler outlook.  My hope, and the hope of those who have been diligently and faithfully walking with me day by day, is that ForeverWhy will be another tool for coping and healing…along with keeping family connected to our growing.  And perhaps be a resource for others feeling overwhelmed, trapped, suffocated, lost…in their own complicated crazy.  I not only wish to blog about what’s going on with us, or my opinions and ideas, but also to share resources and help.  Well…and to have some fun too.  I’m ready to fly with ForeverWhy again.

It’s a long road to healing.  Come join me…it’s always better when we don’t have to journey alone.